Thursday, December 2, 2010

Ooh, harsh...

I have this cousin from my mom's side who left home probably 7 years ago to work as a...uhm...(oh, I'm just going to say it) a prostitute or a GRO or some other job related to it. She's been different places like Japan and all that to be a dancer or something. I never really asked her. I actually haven't told anyone that we talk 'til this year ('cause I vowed I'll be more honest this year). It's not that I'm ashamed of what she's become. It's more of I didn't want to get involved with the mess she made.

Her leaving my grandparents was - still is - a big deal with the family because she didn't tell anyone where she went or what had happened to her. She popped out of nowhere around 2, 3 years ago for our aunt's (her favorite aunt) wedding and not without people staring or talking behind her back. Some of our aunts would even scream at her for not being grateful and that she should get the hell out of the house.

That was the last time we all saw her. But now, we get to talk to her through Facebook. I think that the only mistake she did with Facebook was she reconnected with our narrow-minded aunts who couldn't understand any better (they were pretty harsh on me being pregnant, too, but I've already graduated college and had a decent job and didn't walk away from the family so I couldn't care any less). Now, one of those aunts posted this to her wall:

I didn't think she deserved this. I mean, she took responsibility of what she did. I'd rather have this done to someone who couldn't stand up to what s/he did. Someone who didn't leave the house for free electricity, free water, free tuition fee for their children and for everything they should be responsible about.

Okay, maybe she went overboard by posting her provocative (understatement) "modeling" photos online. I found that disturbing, too because we had small cousins who has their own Facebook accounts who might get a glimpse of her photos but I don't know.

I just don't think it's right to condemn her, you know? People change. Maybe she just hasn't realized what she did. As Stephen Covey puts it, "Seek first to understand, then to be understood". They are not giving her the chance to explain... Heck, they are not even giving her the opportunity to talk to them. All I'm saying is, I think they/we should talk to her first. Listen to what she's saying then think of a more positive solution to the problem, not treat her like trash.

I probably will suggest this to my mom tonight. How I'll open the topic up, I still don't know.

1 comment: