I came face-to-face with one of the meanest people I will ever meet in my lifetime this weekend. I used to think that kontrabidas just lived inside the television until this witch came waltzing in, complete with a fan, a raised eyebrow and her perfectly combed hair. Imagine Susan Roces minus the positive aura.
If I were given the chance to be honest with her - and if I were a rude sonofabitch - there are 3 things I'd like to tell her: 1) Leave my daughter out of this. 2) Don't you ever talk down on me again. I respect the elderly but - and you could ask my boyfriend, your nephew, about this - I am not one to take that kind of talk and just be cool with it. I have a really bad temper and I am not afraid to let it loose especially when I am protecting myself and the people I care about the most. It doesn't matter that you're old and you're my boyfriend's aunt; you WILL hear from me if you do that again. And 3) Your money doesn't make you better than anyone. You might be rich financially but for me, you definitely are the poorest person to walk the Earth with that attitude.
After the encounter with the worst person I know, I felt gratitude. I felt thankful that my parents, despite their imperfections, NEVER made anyone feel that way. Yeah, my mom gossips a lot and tend to be a tad bit judgemental especially when it comes to people's physical appearance and my dad can be painfully critical of everyone around him but they have never made anyone feel that they're above them. They can be self-righteous from time to time but who isn't, right? Point is, they have a lot to brag about, too, but they never exuded that "high and mighty" air that woman seemed to have bathed in; most especially not to family. That wench keep stepping all over her family, you'd be surprised she's still alive.
You know what's even more surprising, though? She's never missed a Sunday mass in her life. Talk about ironic.
Showing posts with label Family. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Family. Show all posts
Sunday, December 20, 2015
Wednesday, October 8, 2014
Does this apply to EVERYONE?
"It's amazing how much your life opens up once you stop filling it with meaningless activities and pointless drama. Cut complainers, haters, manipulators, and other idiots out of your life and watch your life expand in every direction."-Isaiah Hankel
Like, you know, cut people who are actually related to you out of your life to make everything bearable? I'm not saying treating them like they're dead or something but just - I don't know - stop letting them affect me and the decisions I make?
Sometimes the positive thinking quotes/advice I read online contradict each other, I don't know which one to follow anymore.
Friday, October 3, 2014
Age-old question that seems to have no answer.
Disclaimer: This post is all over the place. You have been warned.
I know I've asked this billions of times over 300 million channels in the past but I still don't have an answer that satisfies me: Am I being selfish for SOMETIMES following what my gut tells me to do?
I seem to have finally found the courage to stand up to my bullies and assert myself but everyone else - at least, those I see on a normal basis - thinks that I am being selfish; thinking of just myself all the freakin' time. Normally, I would agree with them - because I have really low self-esteem - but thing is I don't feel like I'm being selfish now.
I know when I am just being a brat and like a normal human being, I'd deny it to anyone willing to listen but deep deep down, I know I'm just acting out. Now, though, even with all the drama, I know that I'm not doing all of these just for the hell of it. There are much, much deeper explanations that I have for thinking and talking the way that I do now. Problem is I am finally sick and tired of having to explain myself every damn time just to prove that what I'm doing is right, or at the very least, for the betterment of the situation. I mean, I've said and done it at least 5x in the past but I always, always end up being misinterpreted. That, or what I say is being deliberately taken out of context so they can blame me for screwing everything up.
So I did what they all wanted me to do: I shut up. No more opinions. No more anecdotes. No more "knowing it all". No more anything from me. I just clammed up. I still hear how immature I am being, how bratty I am, and how I screwed this family up by living in my own little world but at least I don't add up to the "mistakes" they think I make on a daily basis.
Now, I know they are blaming everything on the boyfriend. I mean, that's just how their minds work. They don't believe that I can come up with a decision all by myself. They don't believe I can actually think for myself (which is quite insulting if you think about it but I've been living with this for 26 years that it doesn't even bother me anymore). While I make all the decisions for both Brianna and I, Alfred has a played a part in all this by supporting me. Never in my 11 years of dating have I found someone so supportive that for the first time in my life, I am actually betting on myself. I've had these thoughts for the looooongest time but only now did I get the courage to actually pursue them one by one. I can never stress this enough: Support goes a long damn way. So technically, yes, he should get part of the blame because he believes in me and my ability to make things happen.
(I am drifting away from the original intention of this post. Selfishness. Yeah.)
After all that has been said and done, I believe that I am not selfish for doing the things that I do. I am not stepping on anyone's toes and I am not intentionally hurting those people who get affected. I do the things that I do because I need to do them...for myself and for my daughter. I am, first and foremost, a mom now and if people can't understand that, well, it's, quite frankly, not my problem anymore.
I know I've asked this billions of times over 300 million channels in the past but I still don't have an answer that satisfies me: Am I being selfish for SOMETIMES following what my gut tells me to do?
I seem to have finally found the courage to stand up to my bullies and assert myself but everyone else - at least, those I see on a normal basis - thinks that I am being selfish; thinking of just myself all the freakin' time. Normally, I would agree with them - because I have really low self-esteem - but thing is I don't feel like I'm being selfish now.
I know when I am just being a brat and like a normal human being, I'd deny it to anyone willing to listen but deep deep down, I know I'm just acting out. Now, though, even with all the drama, I know that I'm not doing all of these just for the hell of it. There are much, much deeper explanations that I have for thinking and talking the way that I do now. Problem is I am finally sick and tired of having to explain myself every damn time just to prove that what I'm doing is right, or at the very least, for the betterment of the situation. I mean, I've said and done it at least 5x in the past but I always, always end up being misinterpreted. That, or what I say is being deliberately taken out of context so they can blame me for screwing everything up.
So I did what they all wanted me to do: I shut up. No more opinions. No more anecdotes. No more "knowing it all". No more anything from me. I just clammed up. I still hear how immature I am being, how bratty I am, and how I screwed this family up by living in my own little world but at least I don't add up to the "mistakes" they think I make on a daily basis.
Now, I know they are blaming everything on the boyfriend. I mean, that's just how their minds work. They don't believe that I can come up with a decision all by myself. They don't believe I can actually think for myself (which is quite insulting if you think about it but I've been living with this for 26 years that it doesn't even bother me anymore). While I make all the decisions for both Brianna and I, Alfred has a played a part in all this by supporting me. Never in my 11 years of dating have I found someone so supportive that for the first time in my life, I am actually betting on myself. I've had these thoughts for the looooongest time but only now did I get the courage to actually pursue them one by one. I can never stress this enough: Support goes a long damn way. So technically, yes, he should get part of the blame because he believes in me and my ability to make things happen.
(I am drifting away from the original intention of this post. Selfishness. Yeah.)
After all that has been said and done, I believe that I am not selfish for doing the things that I do. I am not stepping on anyone's toes and I am not intentionally hurting those people who get affected. I do the things that I do because I need to do them...for myself and for my daughter. I am, first and foremost, a mom now and if people can't understand that, well, it's, quite frankly, not my problem anymore.
Sunday, August 17, 2014
Monday, August 11, 2014
I stand corrected...
When I was in college, I thought I lived with narrow-minded people. Turns out, I actually live with closed-minded people.
Day 11. #100HappyDaysV2.0
I had to shut my mouth for this girl right here despite the mean things that have been said about me. I'm enduring every blow thrown my way to give her the best life I can offer her.
Sunday, August 10, 2014
Day 10. #100HappyDaysV2.0
Much-needed Sundate with these two. I haven't thought of a single problem the entire time we were out.
Also thankful for this guy's mom for making me and Brianna feel like we actually are a part of her family. We felt comfortable around her; no judgements, no expectations, just love. Yes, she actually made us feel loved…accepted. Such a great woman, that woman. So thankful she raised her son the way she did. Kami ng anak ko ang tunay na nakikinabang.
Monday, August 4, 2014
Day 4. #100HappyDaysV2.0
Was chatting with this girl right here a few minutes ago. We met back in the 90s and only because she went to the same school I did...that and she's the sister of one of my "sworn enemies" (according to my barkada) who's now my boyfriend.
This family... I don't know what I did to deserve such kindness from each and everyone of them. They actually love us (Brianna and I). It's so overwhelming, really. I am so thankful for his very supportive and loving family.
Sunday, August 3, 2014
Day 3. #100HappyDaysV2.0
Today was a pretty tough day. A lot has been said and A LOT has been done but by the end of the day, I've finally truly appreciated my mom. She's one helluva woman, my mom. I guess I was too self-absorbed to notice a lot of things happening inside the house and with her but I commend her for not giving up.
We don't have any recent photos together so I'm using an old one, from my lola tita's birthday party March 2014.
Friday, August 1, 2014
Day 1. #100HappyDaysV2.0
I have been craving for Yum since last week but I've been trying to not spend any money lately. Enter Brianna and her yearly cough and cold fit. She wanted Chickenjoy. I couldn't deny my sick baby her request so I gave in. I asked my brother, Carlo, to run to the nearest Jollibee to grab Brianna's Chickenjoy...and my Yum burger! Wooh!
Also appreciated the fact that my brother wasn't grumpy when I asked him to make the Jollibee run but that's probably because of his Jollibee freebie. Still thankful nevertheless.
Wednesday, April 2, 2014
Thursday, March 27, 2014
Something huge.
For the past few days, I've been thinking of this huge thing a lot. It's something that I've been wanting to do since I graduated from high school. It might not be that big for some people but I've wanted this for the longest time and I know it is worth the risk; I just don't know if I actually am ready for it. Okay, I am mostly ready for it except for this one aspect of my life that's been rather elusive: The financial aspect. Everything else, I don't have a problem with.
Actually, and I've been telling this to a lot of people, the financial aspect is easy. What's hard - at least for me - is actually telling the important people in my life about it. I know it is ultimately my decision so whether or not they're on board, they can't do anything about it but there's a part of me who wants everything to be alright when I let them know. Yung wala bang samaan ng loob.
Look, for some people, this might not be that big a deal but if you know how everyone around me thinks of my capabilities, you'd understand. That's the same reason why I'm struggling with a lot of things, especially when it comes to what I know is best for both me and my daughter.
I'm not expecting for them to support it, knowing how they thinkso lowly of me that I'm still a child. I just want them to respect the decision. MY decision.
(No, not necessarily doing it right after posting this but I want to do it hopefully this year.)
(No, I'm not getting married...yet! :p)
Ooh, and PS. I think the Universe agrees with me...and actually want me to get down to it ASAP.
Actually, and I've been telling this to a lot of people, the financial aspect is easy. What's hard - at least for me - is actually telling the important people in my life about it. I know it is ultimately my decision so whether or not they're on board, they can't do anything about it but there's a part of me who wants everything to be alright when I let them know. Yung wala bang samaan ng loob.
Look, for some people, this might not be that big a deal but if you know how everyone around me thinks of my capabilities, you'd understand. That's the same reason why I'm struggling with a lot of things, especially when it comes to what I know is best for both me and my daughter.
I'm not expecting for them to support it, knowing how they think
(No, not necessarily doing it right after posting this but I want to do it hopefully this year.)
(No, I'm not getting married...yet! :p)
Ooh, and PS. I think the Universe agrees with me...and actually want me to get down to it ASAP.
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| From the PSI Newsletter, posted on my Instagram account |
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| From the Marc and Angel Hack Life website, posted on my Twitter account |
Tuesday, January 7, 2014
The Science of Happiness - An Experiment in Gratitude
I stumbled upon this video while I was browsing through my Facebook feed just a few minutes ago (started writing this post at 12:14pm). After attending the seminar that changed my life back in 2010, I vowed to myself to read books, watch shows and click on links that I know will uplift my spirits so I did just that; I clicked on the link. A few seconds into the video, I thought "Ay, alam ko na'to" but after watching the whole video, I can't help but tear up a bit and feel all happy(/ier?) than I already am and I suddenly felt the need to express my gratitude towards this specific person. So now, I will be doing what the "happy scientist" suggested by the end of the video: I will be writing about that person who gave a huge contribution to who I am now and how I see myself most of the time: My Tatay.
For the record, I don't have the guts to actually tell what I'm about to write to him over the phone, let alone in person so I just hope he stumbles upon this post somehow...
The person who's made the biggest impact in my life is my Tatay. He's been my rock for as long as I can remember. There has been a lot - and I mean A LOT - of times when I have disappointed him - I know because he makes the disappointment known - but at the end of the day, he's the first person who makes me feel loved despite everything. He talks about me (and my little accomplishments) with pride to practically everyone who's willing to listen - and with me in the same area, within earshot - which really means a lot especially to someone who's been struggling with her self-esteem for the most part of her life (quite ironic with the whole idea of this small project but there's a back story I'm not willing to go into...not right now, anyway). He always, always gives me a pat on the back whenever I did a job, no matter how small, well done which never fails to send a warm feeling in my chest.
He never interferes whenever I have a confrontation with my mom - which I always lose in because, well, "I'm just a kid" - but when I make a strong point, he's the person who acknowledges it.
He might not be in favor of a lot of my choices and he always gives me a piece of his mind in his scary, angry voice but once I make the decision, whether it favors him or not, he supports me with it (but not without getting the cold treatment haha!). Not just the para masabi lang support that most parents tend to give their children but real support wherein I don't hear any sumbat after I suffer the consequences he told me about in the first place. He helps me pick up the pieces of whatever's broken but just hands them to me, to make me figure out how I should piece them all back together myself (which I really appreciate 'cause that's how I want things to be in the first place). And if ever I finally made the right decision, I can feel the pride and the happiness radiating from him even if he has his poker face on and he remains silent for the most part. He might not say it but I feel loved with every "'Nak" uttered and every little smile sent my way.
I'd be lucky to find a partner who's half the man my Tatay is. I think that when that person comes, he'd know the man's right for me, too. I mean, parents have that kind of instinct, right?
I love my Tatay so much even though I don't say it much (I don't think I've ever said it to his face) and practically everyone knows how I'm a self-proclaimed Daddy's Girl even if he never made us, his kids, feel like he has a favorite among us. Bakit ba? Feeling ko lang naman yun and I'm pretty sure my sister feels the same way, too.
I've never teared up that much for a blog entry before but I really feel good right now. I started 2014 with gratitude and I know it's still too early to tell but as I've said in my Instagram post, so far, so damn good. This Science of Happiness thing is true. I encourage everyone to try it. :)
Tuesday, December 31, 2013
2013 in photos
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| New Year's Day/Exchange gifts | Tejada Banner Residence, Sucat | January 1, 2013 |
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| BonoSoc Tagaytay Getaway | Cruz Jestra Residence, Tagaytay | January 12, 2013 |
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| LR19 Get-Together | Krocodile Grille/Capriciossa Greenbelt, Makati | January 16, 2013 |
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| Jasmine Kate's First Birthday | Fun Ranch Tiendesitas, Ortigas | February 3, 2013 |
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| Brianna's Second Birthday | Tejada Ahlen Residence, Pasig | February 5, 2013 |
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| Kat's 25st Birthday Celebration | Beers Paradise, Makati | February 16, 2013 |
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| Job's Seventh Birthday | Mercedes Village, Pasig | February 24, 2013 |
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| Good Friday | Manila Ocean Park, Manila | March 29, 2013 |
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| Get-together at Lola Purita's Wake | La Funeraria Paz, Manila Memorial Park, Sucat | April 6, 2013 |
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| Welcome Home, Enzo Party | Declaro BF Residence, Paranaque | April 7, 2013 |
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| National Geographic Earth Day Run | Fort Bonifacio | April 28, 2013 |
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| Father's Break from the Seminary | Tejada Ahlen Residence, Pasig | May 11, 2013 |
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| Mother's Day Weekend | Pansol, Laguna | May 11-12, 2013 |
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| Mama's 51st Birthday | Richmonde Hotel, Ortigas | May 17, 2013 |
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| Tatay's 80th Birthday | Fortezza Party Place, Novaliches | May 18, 2013 |
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| Brianna's Second Christian Birthday | Tejada Ahlen Residence, Pasig | May 28, 2013 |
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| DLSU-AdMU Benefit Game | Mall of Asia Arena, Manila | June 2, 2013 |
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| Enzo's Christening | Our Lady of Peace Parish, Sucat | June 15, 2013 |
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| Tatay's 50th Birthday Celebration | Subic Freeport Zone, Olongapo | June 29-30, 2013 |
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| Tatay's 50th Birthday Dinner | Claw Daddy, Shangri-La Mall, Mandaluyong | July 2, 2013 |
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| Declaro Kids' Recital | 19 East, Paranaque | July 7, 2013 |
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| Trip to Ark Avilon Zoo | Ark Avilon Zoo Tiendesitas, Ortigas | August 12, 2013 |
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| Oplan Balik-Alindog Kick-off | Declaro BF Residence, Paranaque | September 2, 2013 |
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| LR19 Invades the South | NLOS, BF Paranaque | September 6, 2013 |
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| Birthday Celebration with LH Friends | Tejada Ahlen Residence, Pasig | September 13, 2013 |
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| Birthday Salubong | Tides, Pasig | September 14, 2013 |
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| Rich's 25th Birthday Celebration | Santos Tagaytay Residence, Tagaytay | September 28, 2013 |
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| JaButch Engagement Party | Orola Better Living Residence, Bicutan | October 11, 2013 |
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| Nanay's 79th Birthday | Serrano Capri Residence, Novaliches | October 15, 2013 |
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| Ren's 25th Birthday Celebration | Panganiban Casa Residence, Sucat | October 19, 2013 |
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| Trick or Treat | Tiendesitas, Ortigas | October 26, 2013 |
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| Declaro Kids' Recital | Bowler Bar, Makati | October 26, 2013 |
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| Mega Style Series | Prive, Fort Bonifacio | October 29, 2013 |
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| Undas 2013 | Fontana Leisure Parks, Clark, Pampanga | November 2-3, 2013 |
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| Niko and Janelle Birthday Celebration | Orola Better Living Residence, Bicutan | November 9, 2013 |
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| Ghetto Night | Tejada Ahlen Residence, Pasig | November 25, 2013 |
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| Jan's 19th Birthday Celebration | Tagaytay City | December 7-8, 2013 |
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| Welcome Home, Apple Inuman | Tejada Ahlen Residence, Pasig | December 13, 2013 |
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| LH Batch 2001 Christmas Party | Santos Valley 1 Residence, Sucat | December 20, 2013 |
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| Nanay's Wake | La Funeraria de Novaliches, Novaliches | December 24-28, 2013 |
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| Nanay's Libing | Holy Cross Memorial Park, Novaliches | December 29, 2013 |
(After posting all these here, I realized that I don't take that much photos anymore. There are a lot of things I've done this year that aren't in this post but I guess that's what Twitter and this blog is for. Happy New Year!)
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